Working women frequently face unfair judgments and unsolicited criticism about their roles as mothers and wives. Bollywood actress Kajol recently addressed this patriarchal scrutiny during an appearance on Shubhankar Mishra's podcast Newsbook. She openly discussed being labeled a bad mother and bad wife, stating that she no longer allows such baseless commentary to stress her. Kajol emphasized that her children love her and consider her the biggest gift in their lives, showing the stark difference between external judgments and her actual family relationships. Clinical psychologist Aparna Rai from Cadabams Hospitals explained how internalizing negative labels can severely harm mental health and self-identity. Such labels trigger cognitive dissonance, where a person's positive self-view conflicts with external criticism. Over time, this can lead to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and identity disturbance. Rai also outlined strategies for managing these harmful labels, including cognitive reframing, self-compassion, and professional therapy.
Impact on Mental Health and Relationships
Internalizing labels like "bad mother" or "bad wife" profoundly affects mental health by altering one's core self-concept. According to clinical psychologist Aparna Rai, the brain begins treating these statements as facts about identity. Cognitive biases amplify this effect, causing individuals to fixate on mistakes while ignoring positive moments. This leads to depression, guilt, anxiety, and loss of self-esteem. These negative labels also damage interpersonal relationships. People become hypersensitive to criticism, withdraw socially, and engage in excessive people-pleasing. Neutral comments from partners may be misinterpreted as accusations, creating defensive responses and conflict. Mothers might become inconsistent in parenting, either overly permissive or strict, confusing children and straining partnerships. Partners and children may feel they are walking on eggshells, eroding trust and emotional intimacy, which ironically reinforces the belief of failure.
Source: Link